You Might Have a Bad Listing If.....

I am sure you have heard Jeff Foxworthy’s “You Might Be A Redneck If” Jokes…. Well this is a REALTORS take on….

You Might Have a Bad Listing If…

1. If you have to walk sideways down the hall to get to the bedroom, or if the color of the bedroom carpet looks remarkably like piles of dirty clothes ….You might have a bad listing

2. If you cannot determine the paint color of the walls for all the “stuff” hanging on them... Or if children are being scared by the sellers extensive collection of porcelain head clown dolls….You might have a bad listing

3. If the grass in the yard and/or the weeds in the plant beds are knee high. ….You might have a bad listing

4. If the yard is cluttered with broken toys, automobile parts and other memorabilia the seller has collected…and/or if the brass on the front door is greener than the knee high grass in the yard. ….You might have a bad listing

5. If the sellers don't make arrangements for their 2 dogs and 3 cats while the home is to be shown…. And/or if your feedback from the one showing only said these four words…”DOG POOP ON FLOOR” ….You might have a bad listing

6.  If the roof has 3 foot pine trees growing from the gutters…. You might have a bad listing

7. If you need to hand out gas masks during showings…. even if the seller says “Well, I can’t smell anything”… You might have a bad listing

8. If the seller stays home during showings, drinking beer and watching WWF with all their friends. (Nothing against drinking beer and WWF…but I’m just saying)… You might have a bad listing

9. If you can't find the kitchen sink for the dirty dishes and pizza boxes…. And/or if the inside of the oven appears as if a lasagna IED detonated inside it…. You might have a bad listing

10. If the drain in the bathroom shower has hair growing out of it… You might have a bad listing

And The #1 You Might Have A Bad Listing If” …

If there is a nude oil painting of either… or both… of the sellers hanging over the master bedroom waterbed…(and they refuse to take it down during showings)… You might have a bad listing

I am sure you can add a few more to this list…feel free to post comments on some of the “bad listing” items you have encountered….

Eddie Brown 2013